According to developer Neverland Company, the story will be based on Lufia 2, though it’s “not a remake”. It will be an action RPG for the DS. Believe it or not, it’s being made by most of the staff who originally made Lufia 2 on the SNES! Go to Canned Dogs for a translation of the interview and a full rundown on what is known about the game. No news on an English release, but it seems likely, as the producer is Square-Enix.

Edit: the pic was fake. The game actually features badly drawn anime-esque girls. A step up, admittedly, but still!

What do we know about Sexy Poker for Wiiware? The name would imply sexiness, which I have never been opposed to. There is also talk of it including poker, which while several notches less exciting than sexiness, is not something I can complain about. Oh wait, hold on *rumage rumage* here’s a picture:

Hmmm, looks like not content with the quick cash they get allowing terrible cell phone games on Wiiware, Nintendo has expanded their family-friendly image to allow terrible cellphone strip poker games as well. Nothing sexy about that!

The crying shame here is that if Nintendo is gonna be a hypocrite and allow this (remember, these are the people that said “beer pong” was an unacceptable Wiiware name), the least they can do is put some actual sexy games up for download. Cho Aniki was a good first start in the sexiness department, but I need to see some good ol’ Japanese eroge to help counter that ugly, ugly sexy poker picture above.

Of course eroge involves actual nudity (amongst many, many other things), which Sexy Poker apparently does not. Damn, Sexy Poker is sounding less and less sexy all the time. I played this one eroge called Sexy Beach – and say what you want about it -  it at least had the decency to deliver on its promise of sexiness… and beaches for that matter.

Thanks, Nintendo Life

http://wiiware.nintendolife.com/news/2009/07/sexy_poker_esrb_rated_sans_nudity

Offworld reports that VG accessory maker, Innex, is releasing an adapter for the Wii which will allow one to plug in NES, SNES, and N64 controllers. This is perfect for VC games like Sin and Punishment and Starfox 64. Nostalgic players will also likely enjoy playing their NES and SNES game on their respective controllers.

A quick look at innex’s website reveals they mostly sell plastic crap, but frankly, this is all they needed to do to redeem themselves, since, oh, say NINTENDO needn’t bother themselves to give gamers what they’ve been asking for.

http://www.offworld.com/2009/05/innex-retro-adapter-activates.html

Yeah, really objective reporting going on here.

Popular shmup developer, Cave, recently released Deathsmiles 2 to Japanese arcades. The game offers a unique new distribution method which gives arcades the option of receiving the game for free, in exchange for them sharing a share of the game’s profits with Cave, thus minimalizing the risk brought on by the hefty cost of new arcade boards

Well, those arcades whose chose the new distribution method are probably pretty glad they did, because upon first impressions, Deathsmiles 2 is a disaster. As of now, the game has a mere 2 selectable characters and only 4 levels, all of which are short for a shmup. There is no selectable difficulty and people are beating the game on 1 credit, left and right. The 3D graphics look abysmal compared to the gourgious pixel art of Deathsmiles 1, and likewise the enemy design is lackluster.

Deathsmiles 2 feels more like a demo than a full game. It is very safe to assume more levels and characters will be unlocked at a later date. The game even says “to be continued” when you beat it. But while this is an okay method for prolonging the life of fighting and music games, it really doesn’t suit a game where the whole point is to get a high score.

Those outside of Japan who want to play Deathsmiles 2 will have to wait for an Xbox 360 port, which while not announced, seems likely with Cave’s recent trend of releasing all their new shmups for the 360. Don’t expect it to be region free though.

In my previous editorial I may have sounded harsh towards towards the people Japan defines as ‘Otaku‘. I referred to them as vile, scum-sucking pedophiles, or something along those lines. But what I didn’t touch on is what defines an otaku. If you were to ask a Japanese, they might use words such as disgusting, idiotic, pathetic, and fanatical. One Japanese woman referred to them as “ningen janai” (not human). This societal contempt is very real, and I would go as far as to say in Japan there is even a mini McCarthyism against otaku. Otaku are very real, but they don’t dare ‘come out’, instead meeting in dark, small rooms where they can build model Gundam and play Melty Blood in peace.

When I first came to Miyazaki, I was unable to find any other gamers. With no other choice, I put aside my comfortable nerdy traits and socialized like a normal person. It’s not so bad, though there are a considerable less amount of fireballs involved. Little did I know, the otaku were among me; they just couldn’t show it in public for fear of being ostracized. Then I met Isamu, the head of the international club. A veterinary student, nearly fluent in English and extremely intelligent, with spiky hair which reportedly took him an hour to prepare every morning. He was quite popular, and never gave the slightest indication that he liked nerdy things. Finally, as we were leaving club one day the subject of anime somehow came up and I was asked what anime I liked. After listing the norms, I let slip that I liked Genshiken. The floodgates were open. Isamu practically flipped out and threw a barrage of otaku questions at me.

He told me after he graduates veterinary school he wants to study overseas and that his grandfather (in typical Japanese tradition) forbids it, insisting Isamu get married and live in Miyazaki his whole life. To ‘appease’ his grandfather, Isamu sent him a letter saying he agreed and to marry and that enclosed was a picture of his girlfriend. Enclosed was a picture of Saber from Fate/Stay Night. I was not surprised to hear that the grandfather called Isamu’s parents in a rage asking how he turned out so poorly, to which they could only reply “we don’t know”. It’s enough to make me wish my grandpa was a less understanding man, just so I could of pissed him off in hilarious ways.

Isamu’s apparent joy of finding a gaijin otaku, had him outing me personally to the other international club members. He told the girl members too, “Get this! Mikku likes Genshiken!” “Mikku is an otaku, haha! “, to which the girl members did not respond favorably. They never do *sigh*. Isamu and I aren’t fanatics, or even socially awkward, and the idea of someone holding prejudice against me or anyone because of what entertainment they enjoy dumbfounds (unless it’s Dr. Phil. If you like Dr. Phil you are a bad person). The situation is not unlike American high school cliques, except that shunning nerds continues on into adulthood in Japan whereas in America nerdy hobbies are if anything gaining in acceptance and popularity.

The future of otaku in Japan is grim. To my dismay I am forced to keep my hobbies to myself. Perhaps with greater language skills I could find social groups more accepting, but until then I remain a closet otaku. Well, at least my Japanese friends like Wii Sports. God Damn Wii Sports.

I stroll down Nipponbashi Dori, as is my liking for a lazy Sunday in Osaka, and stop for some takogoyaki. You haven’t had good takogoyaki until you’ve tried it from Nakamura’s stand near Kujimori Gamu Centa. The experience is akin to deflowering a nubile Nihonjin geisha. As I peel back the first petal – sorry. Sweet Jesus, sorry. I wanted to try writing like Tim Rogers. I had some stuff about bumping in to Hideo Kojima, but I got nauseous writing as much as I have.

What I’m actually here to talk about is the disillusionment of otakudom. I’m writing from my dorm room at the University of Miyazaki in Kyushu, Japan. What events ultimately lead me to be here? Though I am loath to admit it, video games and anime. I remember when I first started studying Japanese in college. I got myself a Japanese language partner. In one of our first conversations I proudly proclaimed that I was an otaku. I still recall the mixed expression of revulsion and puzzlement on her face. I might as well have told her I had syphilis. Her reaction confused me just as much. “Whats wrong with liking nerdy Japanese things?” In the U.S. ‘nerd’ is a positive term. It has come a long way since the Fonz first coined the phrase. Computers and video games are mainstream and embraced by nearly all; shouldn’t this hold true for the Japanese equivalent of the term nerd?

Well as it turns out, like the many other terms weeaboos have adopted from Japanese language, they totally misinterpreted otaku as well. An otaku isn’t someone who enjoys a good game of KoF in between going out with his girlfriend and contributing to society in a positive manor. An otaku is apparently a vile, scum-sucking, lecherous fiend. The likes of which should – nay – must be rounded up and shot. You may have heard the term hikikomori: A Japanese person who shuns all outside and social interaction in favor of an escapist digital world. The closest U.S. equivalent would be that friend of yours that you never see anymore because they now play WoW twenty hours day. One night you bumped into him at the supermarket (the only outside excursions these people have). You said “hey, how’s it going?” and were met with a ten minute rant about his latest raid followed up by bitching about the balance changes made in the last patch. Your friend is so hopelessly lost he can’t even understand that you don’t give a shit.

It’s fun to exaggerate and embellish. It makes your pathetic, mundane life seem interesting when you talk about it. But I’m not exaggerating. Hikikomori, of which there are many, have rejected normal life to the point where they no longer understand it. 10-year-olds are not meant to be sex objects. It’s no wonder the associated term otaku is met with disdain and contempt in Japan. Normal people don’t play video games (as we know them) in Japan. Apart from casual DS and Wii games, the only other mainstream gaming is online or in game centers (arcades). Most of these game centers have given up on normal arcade cabinets, and only keep music games and UFO caters (crane games), with perhaps a few guncon games thrown in. I don’t try to hide my affinity for gaming here in Japan, but when asked what games I like, I reply ”Super Mario”. I want to say “right now I’ve been playing a lot of Dodonpachi Dai Ou Jou”, but they don’t want to hear that. They don’t know what the hell that is. They want to hear “Super Mario”, so that they can laugh and say “Haha, I like Super Mario too”. Then I die on the inside just a little more.

Back in America we have a culture of Japanophiles trying to emulate a different, imaginary culture. It’s not their fault. They don’t know better. But it is sick. Go to an anime convention if you don’t believe me. Even when the Japanese hardcore video game industry dies out, anime will be there to pervert actual Japanese culture in the eyes of ignorant American high-school students and adults who can’t grow up. I understand all too well he appeal of Japanese escapist media, but as my life takes me from otakudom to someone who theoretically could eek out a life in Japanese society, I look back and can do nothing but cringe.

Enjoy games. Enjoy anime. Enjoy Pocky if you absolutly must. But for the love of all that is holy and good, don’t identify with them.

Treasure is announcing on their site they are developing a new Bleach title for the Wii called Bleach Versus Crusade. Little in known about it, but it will be a 2 player 3D fighter developed by the Treasure team that did the two Bleach fighters for the DS. While this means the title will probably be good (and definitely better than that Bleach schlock on PSP), Treasure fans are deeply disappointed as it reaffirms Treasure’s new trend of only making sequels and licensed games.

Today is an epic day for Nintendo of America. For the first time since the NOA’s founding in 1980, they have acknowledged gay people exist, with the virtual console release of the homoerotic shooter, Chou Aniki.

Nintendo has been known for its excessive censorship. For years even the slightest reference to subjects like relegion, alchohol, and yes homosexuality were completely removed from the U.S. release of Nintendo games. In recent years, Nintendo has lighted up on these policies, leaving the censorship decisions to  publishers. Up until now, we have seen no references to homosexuality in a game on any Nintendo console (no, Tingle doesn’t count!).

Chou Aniki is a shmup for the Tubo Grafix featuring muscular body builders and very mild homoerotic imagery. The game spawned many sequels which are much more explicit. So by normal standards, Chou Aniki really isn’t a big deal at all. In fact the ultra conservative ESRB gave it an E10 rating (I guess nine-year-olds are still too young to look at pixelated body builders).

To me, the significance of this release is that Nintendo, at least on some level, is still listening to core gamers. Chou Aniki wasn’t released for the Wii Sports crowd. Someone somewhere said “I want a big gay shooter where muscle men shoot protein out of holes in their heads”, and Nintendo delivered. If Nintnedo will bring Chou Aniki to U.S. audiances, the sky’s the limit. I’m hoping for the next Chou Aniki game, which is a heck of a lot gayer. That would prove Nintnedo really is removed from their past no gays in games pollicy.

I’ve sat down with the game for a bit and can say the game is pretty fun for its age. Out of the 5000 some archaic shmups released on the virtual console, Chou Aniki is one of the better ones.

Magic Box was kind enough to inform people that Sega has announced a game for their popular (in Japan) Culdcept franchise for the DS. Anyone who’s ever played the game will know that the DS is the perfect system for the series, and multiplayer will be better than ever! It will be interesting to see if you can still see your opponent’s hand in the DS version. With personal DS screens, Sega has the option of hiding everyone’s hand, which would change the strategy drastically (possibly for the worse).

Culdcpet is also coming out for Xbox 360 in the States, quarter 1, 2008.

…in Europe at least. Americans will have to wait another week. here are my impressions of the European version which will likely be identical.

The translation is completely re-done. And done properly this time. No more typos, and the dialog seems written by -well, someone who knows how to write. Many class, skill, and character names have been changed to ones more suitable. And more interestingly, the entire style of the dialog has been changed to something resembling old English. Don’t be put off; it’s nothing like Shakespeare. There aren’t any “Thou arts” or anything. But the way characters speak is poetic, and eloquent, and a few old fashioned words are used. While I find it odd considering I’m so used to the characters speaking how they did in the PS1 version, I can not deny that this version is much better, and it breaths new life back into the incredible story of FFT. Also, you can tell what the heck is going on in the plot since the new translator wasn’t on drugs.

There is slowdown. Many people said that the slowdown was fixed for the English version. I have to wonder if this was propaganda, because I have abundantly apparent slowdown on my version. Indeed, when you perform graphics-heavy move like Gafgarion’s Life Drain, the sound plays ahead of the skill, and you hear the sword strike before the graphics for the giant sword even appears. This is unpleasant but hardly game-killing. And even with the slowdown (which is only on big special effects to my knowledge), the game pace is still fast for an SRPG. Bottom line: it’s a shame, but don’t let it dissuade you from getting the game.

I can’t comment on the new characters or classes ’cause I don’t have ‘em. Likewise, I haven’t tried out the new multiplayer modes (and might not get to since I hear Europe versions aren’t compatible with U.S.). Regardless, even without these enhancements, FFT is still the greatest Tactical RPG ever and you should go out and get it even if it means selling blood. I don’t even care whose blood.